Continued…
When we are serving a greater vision it is easy to say Yes, and say it often… the importance of stewarding your yes is found in establishing healthy boundaries, allowing your yes to be yes – equally your no, no. Boundaries are built upon honour’s foundations. If you truly honour and respect yourself, your team and your church, consider setting boundaries which work for you and your context, cultivate a culture from the top down of permission to make mistakes, be real in your authenticity and say no when you need to – no manipulation, or judgment attached. In this space there is freedom then to move within the parameters of your yes, as well as your no. Healthy boundaries are there to prevent us from running on empty and falling short in the long run. It’s actually okay to say no, and it’s something we ought to become better at. We need to learn how to steward our “yes”.
“Better is a handful of quietness than both hands full with painful effort, a vain striving after the wind and a feeding on it” Ecc 4:6 (AMPC)
Some practical ways to steward your yes:
Find your sabbath:
Say yes to your relationship with God and your relationship with rest. Monday Sabbath works for our family – often after a big Sunday, I’ve found keeping this challenging at times, but have allowed myself permission to leave things unchecked off my to do list, and rest but I am so much better for it. Find what works for you in your schedule – if you’re a shift worker, a mum, working casually while you study or work full time there will always be a gap in your week. If there’s not, perhaps it’s time to revisit priorities and incorporate rest as one of your top 3! Calve out intentional time for nothingness and space. It’s important to be revisiting filling your tank…
Find ways to be filled in:
Say yes to having external input so you have a healthy overflow from your ordinary. Find ways around the rest of your week to be topped up – it might look like podcasts, time at the beach, prayer, the Word just to get you started. Whatever you find recharges you, go there. Let Him speak to you in ways you hadn’t thought. Block out the morning and go journal in a cafe. Block out an afternoon and go for a bush walk. Only you will know what works best for you, but sweeten don’t keep running for the sake of running… find solitude and time to be ministered to. It might mean blocking out a few weeks every 3 months so you have time to go visit other churches or a conference. Change is as good as a holiday – so mix it up a bit and see what happens!
Create room:
Say yes to making space for others to grow and room for you to reignite your passion. Now this is a hard one, because I know how easy it is to keep going rather than delegate to anyone else. But it’s worth training up others as you go so you can trial stepping back for a few weeks, or even just one. If you have been serving week after week, month after month you will no doubt loose a little of your joy or passion. Which is a natural response, to feel like this rote routine is lacking lustre. By stepping back for a few weeks and just being in the congregation you are allowing yourself moments to be fed within your context, along with seeing how your church family see’s church. This shift in perspective can be really helpful to find new ways to minster as well as being ministered to. As the go-hard-and-then-peak pattern is an unhealthy dynamic, incorporate sustainable ways which could allow you a “healthy” ebb and flow by intentionally blocking out specific dates on a regular basis to force yourself to be in that position – guard it though, because there will always be holes in a roster, and there is no need for you to burnout by giving up those boundaries you’ve set in place. Create room too in your day to day to connect with God, and connect with what He is doing in you, not just in your church home.
Work within an Honour code:
Say Yes to creating a culture of honouring one another’s time, availability, boundaries, capacity is so important. What comes from the top, flows down to His people (Psalm 133:3). Honour will always work two ways. We honour our leaders in the way we manage our time, our preparation and being willing to grow. We honour our team when we are operating out of a healthy relationship with God and each other. We honour our team when we build into them, equip them and provide opportunity for them to grow in their gifting. We honour our leaders and our team when we are not over committing ourselves. We honour our team when we are authentic and transparent. When we speak kindly to one another, building each other up even when we’re having a bad day. We honour each other when we are flexible to our framework even when it’s not our ideal. We honour our team when we discipline, pastor and entrust people. We honour our team when we develop leaders to be the best they can be from a heart that genuinely see’s to draw out the best in them. We honour each other when we see we are all learning – on both sides. We honour each when we recognise our capacity may not always line up with someone elses, similarly expectations and commitment levels will differ also. We honour each other when we seek to cultivate a culture of unity.
So sweet one, be wise with what you give your Yes to. Learn to use your No well. Say yes to the things God has called you to, and have the courage to say No to the things that fall outside those boundary lines. Have the grace to love beyond reason when someone disappoints your expectation by saying No, love them where they are at. They too might just be learning to steward their yes.
Until next time…
If you missed part one, you can read it here…